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Overcoming the Six Basic Fears of Entrepreneurship - Part 5

Growing older is one of those things we're told to do gracefully, if we want to enjoy life to its fullest. But many people fear growing older. The thought of it brings to mind poverty, as well as the fire-and-brimstone threats of after-life punishment promulgated by religion.

Mankind has two very sound reasons for apprehension, when it comes to fearing old age. One grows out of our basic distrust of our fellow-man, who we may believe will seize whatever worldly goods we possess as we become old and incapacitated. The other arises from the terrible pictures we hold in our mind of what the "world beyond" possesses.

As we grow older, we also fear for our health, as well as the loss of our attractiveness or sexuality. No one cherishes the thought of being unattractive to the opposite sex, or losing our freedom and independence as a result of mobility problems. But the most common cause of the fear of old age is associated with the possibility of poverty. The "poor-house" is not a pretty picture.

One of the most common symptoms of the fear of old age is the tendency to slow down and develop some form of inferiority complex related to getting older and less attractive. Usually, it happens around the age of forty, when many people falsely believe they are "slipping" because of age. The truth of the matter couldn't be more to the contrary - our most useful years, mentally and spiritually, are those between forty and sixty, and that's a fact.

Another symptom of the fear of getting older is the habit of speaking apologetically about "getting old" just because we've reached a certain age. A good friend of mine, all of eighty-two years old and an early-rising active gardener and walker of mile after mile who could put many a man or woman half his age to shame for their inability to keep up with him, laughs when I tell him he should take it easy. Why, he asks? If, according to him, he slows down and sits around and stops lifting things and no longer goes high-stepping three kilometres down the road to the little mall where he likes to do business he might as well roll over and die. Activity, or so it seems, has kept him alive and vibrant, and we joke about him being that way until he's a hundred. He doesn't know what it means to be sick.

Fearing old age also causes us to lose initiative, to stop using our imagination, and to become reliant on others to look after us because we refuse to do it ourselves. Barring the incapacitation of ill health, dementia, or Alzheimer's, we have no excuse for asking others to live our lives for us. Conversely, fearing old age to the point where we dress and act like a teenager, affecting the mannerisms of youth, will do nothing but inspire ridicule by both friends and strangers.

One of the best books about growing old without fear was written by Dorothy Carnegie. It's called "Don't Grow Old - Grow Up!." In it, the wife of Dale Carnegie, one of the twentieth century's most popular public speaking and confidence-building coaches, says western society "is a land of youth-worshippers." In older civilizations, she writes, "women past middle age are still acknowledged beautiful, charming and desirable, and men of sixty-plus are conceded wise and worshipful [and] we are cheating ourselves, individually and collectively, out of the rewards of maturity by a puerile refusal to grow up and behave like adults." Youth, she concludes, "for all its attractiveness, is only preparation for adulthood, a rehearsal period for the drama of life. To deny one's manhood or womanhood by desiring to live in a state of perpetual youth is an infantile attempt to stave off responsibility for facing life as a full-grown human being."

Indeed, old age sets in only when we cease to grow. Growing old is a contradiction - as long as we are learning, developing, contributing, producing or enjoying, we are maturing, whether we are sixteen or ninety-six. We become old only when we are no longer capable of improvement.

So, how old are you, really? It isn't old age, itself, that you should worry about. It's developing the unpleasant traits that so often come with it - self-pity, whining, a feeling of uselessness, babyish demands for attention, living in the past and all the other horrible habits we abhor in others. As sociologist David Riesman once wrote, it's "an essential aliveness of spirit that keeps the body alive." Don't let the rocking chair get you, in mind or body.

The author, Lorne Peasland, is a former advertising agency owner and national media consultant,
the founder and past-president of the Canadian Home & Micro Business Federation, and author of "Influencing Public
Opinion - A Communications Primer For Political Candidates, Community Activists, and Special Interest Group
Spokespeople" (ISBN 0-9697364-0-1). He is a home-based marketing consultant, writer and speaker, and publisher of HomeBizNew, a syndicated web-based weekly for home-based and small office entrepreneurs. He can be
contacted through either of his web pages at http://www.accept.ca/homebiznews/lorne.html or http://www.accept.ca/homebiznews/pms2.html, via e-mail at lorne@pacificcoast.net., or by phone at 250-708-0250.

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